Daycare.

It's really hard dropping him off and waving goodbye to him as he's crying. :( I'm sure it'll be good for him, but it's still hard. He's going to be so excited to see me when I pick him up, so that will make it all better.

I put his little toy airplane in my purse today. He wanted to take it into the daycare but I didn't want him to leave it there, so I distracted him. Before I went into work, I put it in my purse. I'm weird like that.

Maybe?

I might have some slight nausea going on, as long as I'm not imagining it. In previous pregnancies, around 6 weeks, I end up getting this hungry feeling in my stomach. Hopefully it's not all in my head. I was eating yogurt with Andrew this morning and I could barely eat any, but I forced myself to anyway.

I have a pee stick in my purse and I'm going to go in a little bit to the staff bathroom and use it. I haven't peed on one since Friday night, so...

Updating post to add:

26 dpo, 6/29/09

I'm better today.

Whew! I am easy-going 95% of the time. I'm almost always calm--I think it's just my personality.

I forgot to tell you guys that two mornings ago, Clifford (yes, the kids' show) made me tear up! In the intro, when it says, "Clifford needed Emily, so he chose her for his own...", I got all teary-eyed. It's so sweet! Clifford went from this tiny puppy in her hands to the big dog we all know him as now. All because of her love. How precious is that? ♥

I never really got hormonal with Andrew, so this is a new experience!

URGH!

I really hate the fact that plastic wrap never fucking fits around a standard dinner plate. It's so stupid! why doesn't someone fucking invent a wider roll?! It would make life easier.

Yes, I think I'm officially a hormonal bitch. I started freaking out at the plate as I was trying to put some pizza in the fridge. It was fucking ripping and I wanted to break things. I never act like this.

I am blaming the progesterone supplement because I never get this annoyed!

Twenty-nine years old today...

Woohoo. I am not too excited, but next year will be a big one. This also means Andrew is 22 months old. I can't believe that in just two short months, he will be two. Yet, he is growing up so much--he says so many words now, and can comprehend a lot. I love it.

In other news, DH brought up the "v" word the other day, which in this case stands for "van". (The other "v" word will be happening after this baby is born, which is cool with both of us--thank goodness). He wants to look for a minivan for our second vehicle. Right now we have a 2007 Ford Focus (and we love it), and our second car is a 1997 Nissan Sentra. My brother is looking for a new car, and the Nissan doesn't do DH a lot of good as far as hauling goes (gardeners haul amazing amounts of dirt and wood chips back to the property, especially when it's free at our landfill site). So my brother can buy the Nissan and we'll get rid of it for $1,500. It's in good shape, has new tires, a completely new exhaust that was just put on a couple months ago, and has been a great runner.

Anyway, DH's logic is that a van will function both to haul things and to haul around two kiddos. :) I am actually excited. We are not looking for a new one, but a used one, and he read reviews in the past so he knows which models he'd want and which ones he wouldn't.

A natural deodorant that actually works!

I recently discovered Crystal Deodorant at the suggestions of other semi-hippie friends.

I was a little scared at first, because other natural deodorants I've tried haven't worked worth a damn.

Well, I searched on the website to see if it was available locally, and it was--our Walgreens was the only local place to carry it.

The best thing is, it's guaranteed to last over a year! $6.99 for deodorant that will last over a year?! Wow!

I bought the "stick" version over the roll-on, but it's really a "stone" of some sort. You just have to moisten the stone with water before applying (unless you want to be rubbing something dry on--sounds painful to me).

Did I mention that I'm a heavy sweater? Seriously, I avoid buying white anymore because the pits become yellowed too quickly, even if I wash them all the time.

By using a natural deodorant like Crystal, your body will eventually produce less sweat--the chemicals in regular deodorant cause your body to react by producing more sweat.

I bought some for both DH and myself. I love discovering new products! This deodorant has the breast cancer seal of approval. There are no parabens or aluminum chlorohydrate. It's also fragrance-free.

I'm on my third day, it's been hotter than hot here (yesterday was over 100 degrees with the heat index), and even at the end of the day, no underarm smell! I am truly amazed.

I'll quote this from their website:

"The Un-odorant
Odor is caused by bacteria, which form on the body. Most deodorants on the market today merely mask that odor with unnecessary and unwanted chemicals. They “de-odorize” with the help of chemicals. Crystal deodorants, made of 100% all natural mineral salts, prevent odor from happening in the first place by neutralizing the bacteria. That’s why we believe our products are actually un-odorants, preventing odor, rather than deodorants which just cover it up.

An un-odorant is natural. An un-odorant is light. An un-odorant is effective. An un-odorant is clean. An un-odorant prevents odor from forming.

The Original Deodorant Stone
What makes Crystal deodorants unique are the powerful, all-natural mineral salts that deliver on a simple promise: preventing body odor from occurring - naturally. Here’s how: mineral salts form a topical layer on the skin, which is inhospitable to bacteria that cause odor. All of our deodorants are hypoallergenic, contain no aluminum chlorohydrate, are paraben free, alcohol-free, non-sticky, and non-staining. They dry instantly and don’t leave any residue. Our award-winning, flagship Crystal Body Deodorant is unscented while our brand new Crystal essence line are lightly scented.

For those with sensitive skin or allergies, or people who simply prefer a healthy alternative to mainstream, chemical-laden deodorants, Crystal deodorants are the ideal choice. Our deodorants are rated #1 by the Environmental Working Group for having the safest ingredients among natural deodorants and among mainstream commercial deodorants.

Crystal deodorants are NOT tested on animals, are safe for the environment and are recommended by Cancer Treatment Centers Nationwide.

Crystal Rock and sticks are produced in Thailand. Our roll-ons and sprays are produced in the United States."

I'd like to add that parabens have been found in breast tumors. While it's been denied that breast cancer is linked to deodorant, I beg to differ. If there's a chance, I don't want to take it.

Also, if you are in the trying to conceive category, I encourage you to Google parabens. They are in practically every beauty product: particularly makeups, shampoos and conditioners, lotions, and even baby products. Parabens mimic estrogen in the body and are absorbed into the skin where they immediately go into the bloodstream. Scary stuff, if you ask me! That's why I went "au natural" almost two years ago. I don't regret it. Once you start reading labels, you will be amazed--they put parabens (methylparaben, propylparaben, butylparaben--anything ending in -paraben) in everything! It's a preservative said to increase shelf life and inhibit bacteria. I don't want that in my body. I'm just sayin'.

So, we couldn't wait until Father's Day...

I told him on Friday after work instead!

We were going to shoot for Father's Day, but I just wanted to tell him before today since we had a small gathering for Airfest and I wanted him to know why I wasn't having a drink.

So, I got home from work yesterday and made a card with Andrew (read: I held the crayon in his hand and moved it around, because he didn't really know what to do). I traced both of his hands (they didn't turn out super great, but you can get the general picture). It said, "Daddy" on the front, with a heart. The hand tracings were on the inside, where it said, "Da: Thank you for taking such good care of me, and for loving me, even when I try your patience. Thank you for feeding me fruits! I love you. Love, Andrew. PS: I have a playmate coming 2/24/2010!"

The best thing was, DH was reading this outloud while looking at something on his computer. He read the first sentence ("even when I try your patience"), nodding in agreement. Then he looked at his computer again. It took him FOREVER to read the last line, and he read it twice."No way!", he said, with a smile on his face. He was super surprised! I think he's excited though; last night he was really, um, turned on. He said, "well, now we don't really have to be careful, do we?"

Also, before we gave him the card, I had Andrew give him his present: two pairs of khaki shorts. I handed them to Andrew and said, "give to Da", and he walked them down the hallway and into the kitchen and handed them to him. Super cute! The shorts were so big in his little arms.

ETA: We are keeping this a secret from people until I'm showing. I just don't want to have to "un-tell" people again. It was too hard for me last time.

-----Skip the next section if you're sick of this-----

I had to pee on another stick because my temp has been a little lower the last two days and it was bothering me (it better just be the air conditioning). My morning temp has been at my post-ovulatory, but not triphasic, temp, so it had me all worried. This is from the 4th (or 5th?) pee of the day at 18 dpo.



ETA: update for 6/22: Temp back up to 98.7 this morning. Whew! It was just the air conditioning.

HECKYES!!!!!!!!!!

Amanda, the dear girl from the clinic, called me back to let me know my hCG is now at 120! Up from 33 just 48 hours ago (just shy by 15 minutes, actually). She said the numbers were very good.

I'm pregnant and it's sticking!!!!!!!!!!

I could cry. OMG! ♥

Thank you all for your support and words during this (very scary) time for me.

Andrew and I will work on Daddy's Father's Day card tomorrow. He's going to be so surprised! ;)

2nd beta was at 7:30 this morning.

I really got to thinking. So, my 13 dpo hCG was 33. But that was at 7:45 a.m., which is almost practically (like that?) 12dpo. Really, a lot of the 13 dpo values are probably drawn later in the day. I was probably halfway between 12 and 13 dpo.

On Tuesday, I got my results at 1:00 p.m. (Central Time), so I should know today's in the next two hours. (I have already e-mailed them to make sure they had my work number; I also indicated that I was nervous, so if they could call me as soon as they had them, that'd be great.)

In other news, Andrew is saying many, many more words--new ones all the time. He normally says "Drew" for Andrew, but yesterday he said his full name.

He copies my voice inflection also! I notices that when I say "hi", I say, "Hiii"--the first part is really high pitched. Andrew does the exact same thing. He picked up his xylophone magnetic puzzle piece out of his alphabet book, put it to his ear, and said, "Hiiii", which is what he normally does with his hand (cell phone = hand on ear). What a cute little dork!

I am drunk on Prometrium right now--seriously trippy--but that's okay. It's fun to be drunk at work anyway; makes life interesting (you know how when you're drunk and you turn your head, your eyes seem delayed compared to your motions? Yeah, that....)

My home beta testing...

I'm happy to report that I'm no longer nervous about my numbers. The line is getting darker every day. These were all taken with first morning urine.

(Yes, I know I am a Type A personality, and proud of it!)

12 dpo (6/15/09)

13 dpo (6/16/09) 14 dpo (6/17/09)

Is it normal to feel drunk after taking Prometrium?

LOL, it didn't last too long, but within in an hour of taking the first one, I got VERY dizzy and seriously felt how I feel when I'm getting a buzz.

Very strange.

We went to a movie tonight--The Hangover (pretty funny, but not super, super funny) and as we were driving there I was overcome with dizziness. It was weird. I had taken the pill with food, like they said to do, but who knows. I hope they didn't accidentally put rufies in my pill bottle.

When we got to the theater, I gulped down a bunch of water, and I felt better within 15 minutes.

Hope that doesn't happen every time since I have to take it twice a day, and the morning one will be at work! I'll do what I have to to ensure that my bean has every chance to stay stuck. :)

The clinic called back...

I now have a script for Prometrium 200mg twice a day. The pill form! Yay!

We also scheduled a 9-week ultrasound for July 21st at 9:20 am; afterwards, I will go to my first OB appointment. :)

Blood draw

I had my beta and progesterone draw this morning just before 8:00 a.m.

I just heard from the lab. My HcG is at 33 and my Progesterone is at 15.9. She said she has to review it with the doctor, and she was just giving me the numbers. After Dr. D looks at them, she can then let me know if we will be supplementing with Progesterone. This Amanda lady said my numbers were borderline. I reminded her of 2 losses in less than a year, so hopefully they will just prescribe it since it doesn't hurt anything.

I have a re-draw scheduled for Thursday morning, so I'm praying the beta goes up. Last time around, my Progesterone was at 15 at this point too......but then again, the loss didn't occur until 8 weeks, so I think there's time. I'm still nervous. I'm 13dpo today. Today's test was darker than yesterday's so that's promising...

Cross everything you have for me!!! Thank you....

Updated photo for today (12dpo)

It's faint, but it's there!

This was after three BFNs on FRER, including one this morning. This one is from the third pee of the day at 1:00 p.m. (I thought FRERs were supposed to be the most sensitive, but Equates have always worked well for me, so I'm glad I ran out and grabbed a 3-pack of tests). I'm so nervous, since the last two ended in miscarriage. I hope this bean sticks! I'm going to call my doctor tomorrow and have her get me in for bloodwork (including a Progesterone check)--they will be prescribing Progesterone supplements this time because I will make them, damnit!

Just looked up my due date--February 24, 2010, which is the day before DH's birthday. If this one sticks and grows and arrives on DH's birthday, follows our "25" theme (My birthday 6/25, DH's 2/25, and Andrew's 8/25) that'd be pretty cool!

He doesn't know yet. I'm not going to get him all excited, just in case it doesn't stick. I'm going to tie this into Father's Day somehow! ;) Hopefully, things go well!

I'm testing again tomorrow with first morning urine.

Not a fan of the swings...

This is to counter Rachel's post of her children smiling on the swings. :) He does this every time, and he stiffens up all tight. Don't worry, I didn't leave him in there very long. Once I took him out and gave him a hug, I set him down and he went running for the jungle gym. I'll have to upload his smiling face as he acted like a little spider monkey, climbing those stairs with gusto.

Oh, the stuff that goes on at home while I'm at work...

The hubby just called me and Andrew went running full force into the kitchen. I think he was intending to stop himself with the sliding glass door. The only problem was that it was open! He kept going, landing outside. It's about a foot-and-a-half drop, because one of DH's (extremely slow to complete) projects is putting a couple steps off the back of the house (we used to have a deck, which he tore off before Andrew was born). Andrew cried a little (he landed in the rocks), but is otherwise okay.

INSERT BIG EYEROLL HERE. None of this shit happens when I'm home. I'm glad he's okay, and this is kind-of slightly maybe funny, but my annoyance trumps the humor in this situation.

All in a good night's sleep?

Yesterday was an odd day for us; namely, because Andrew took a three hour power nap from 3:00 - 6:00. I decided to take a nap of my own, so I retired to my bed at 4:00, waking up when Andrew woke up. Because this nap of his was so long, I figured he wouldn't be tired at his usual bedtime (9:00/9:30), so I waited until 10:00 to put him down. It was roughly 12:00 a.m. when he woke, so at that point I just brought him in by me. (He goes down like an angel the first time of the night, when I put him in his crib awake, but that's about it, for now).

So, he came in by me. It was thundering and lightninging (is that even a word?--well, whatever) all night long, but we both slept pretty good.

A side note: he laughs in his sleep. Quite often. Last night was no exception--about two minutes after he fell back asleep, he was laughing, yet I know he was sleeping. What a weirdo. I wonder what he was dreaming about!

This morning, Andrew decided it was time to wake up for the day at 5:30 a.m. (his usual waking time is anywhere from 7:15 - 8:30 a.m.). I tried feeding him to see if I could get him back into a milk coma, but he was geared up and ready to go.

My alarm doesn't go off until 6:30 a.m. and I was trying to doze while this cute little boy was climbing all over me. I'd look at him and he'd smile. It was the sweetest thing. This went on for an hour! He is such a well-behaved boy--I'm so lucky that he doesn't get upset when I want to continue to sleep. I love when he puts his whole body over mine, perpendicular. He loves lying on his mama. Finally, I got up at 6:28, turned the alarm off before it would go off, and stumbled my way to the bathroom, all the while with my blonde cutie following.

Life is good...

New photos of the (not so) little guy!

Daddy blowing bubbles for Andrew!
Mr. Cute at Riverside Park (famous blue bridges in background).

Nothing really new.

Sorry my blog is so boring right now! We enjoyed a beautiful weekend outside. Both Saturday and Sunday were gorgeous. I hung two loads of laundry on the line yesterday; it's been really dry here so they don't take long to dry.

This morning when I left for work, poor Andrew wanted to come with me! I felt so bad closing the door in his face as he cried. :( I normally go out the garage door, but my husband is working on putting the screen door back on (he replaced the regular door), so right now there is a screen door balancing against the regular door (the idiot things he does, I swear).

Sometimes I feel like my life is so routine. By Sunday night, it's like, "well, here we go again. Another week just the same." I wish I were a millionaire so my plan for the day would be to play on the beach with my son (because we live on a beautiful island) and laugh at all the money we had in the bank. Instead, I came to work and processed timecards.