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Friday, August 31, 2012

Mr. Jameson's 1 year well check

This is for my own records in case I need to go back and check, so feel free to ignore this post if baby stats bore you. ;)

Weight: 20 lbs, 14 oz (20th percentile)
Length: 28.5" long (9th percentile) -- compared to Andrew at a year, and holy shiznit, Andrew was 2 inches longer
Head is in the 50th percentile at  46.6 cm (WTF, what is a cm anyway? LOL).

Basically, a top heavy baby (like Baby Tumbles Surprise, remember that thing? LOL, I used to baby-sit for a girl who had one) who smiles all the time, who is very calm, and who growls on command (I "taught" him this while nursing. I would growl and he eventually growled back).

He has a few words: "Mama", "Dada", and "Nom" (that's for food, which he started around 10 months. He didn't want the purees at all so we started with raspberries and he now eats all kinds of food: chicken, broccoli, fruit, etc. -- he sees food and he gos, "Nom!" and wants to try everything.

Still nursing (no surprise with me for those of you who have been following me long enough), along with his sister, who is 2.5.

His nickname is "James", which is not pronounced as it reads but more like "Jaymis" or "Jamus". :) I love him. ♥

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Word verification . . . bye-bye!

Those things are impossible, even for me, so yeah... I turned it off. I only had word verification on for commenting because a few years back, I was getting all this spam in Chinese. LOL.

So feel free to comment on posts once again!

Friday, August 24, 2012

Oh Lordy...

I am STRESSED. I have so much shit to get ready for the party tomorrow (both boys) and I really don't have much experience in this since we don't tend to have big galas for much of anything. At least it's not at my house, because that is a royal disaster. Holy wow, I'm so behind on my housekeeping it's not even funny. Or maybe it is. IDK, it just seems to get the best of me when I have no freaking time, or the time I do have, I'm so exhausted that I plant my ass on the couch and go online. Seriously, my house is a fucking disaster. Shit cluttered all over the counter in the kitchen because everytime DH goes to look for something in one of the drawers, he just takes everything out (we have 7 junk drawers -- SEVEN! I kid you not -- filled with computer stuff he'll never use again but hasn't taken the time to dispose of, various chargers [why so many?! What are they all for?], pencils, coins, rubber bands, papers, maps, old phones, screws, paperclips, installation CDs, binocculars, etc. etc.  It's very frustrating. Our bathroom sits unfinished, after he ripped the tile out of there maybe 7 months ago, intending to put down new tile + some hardwood (tile by the tub/toilet in case of water), paint that needs to go on the walls in there. Clothes freaking everywhere because my oldest changes his outfit 4 times a day and my middle is always stripping down to bare naked. The diapers I had hanging on the line yesterday got rained on last night because stupid me didn't check the forecast. Thundertorms came through at 5 am and at the time I was nursing Jameson and by the time he was done, it had already started raining. So those get an extra day outside today but I also have to wash another load and get that out there. I have four loads of regular clothing to fold and put away. I have paperwork to complete for Andrew's assessment and paperwork to complete for his school.

No time!!! Kids, love them, but hard to complete any task, so we put everything off.

Anyway, I have all this stuff to buy for the party (styrofoam plates, plastic 'silverware', chips, dips, vegetables, beans; balloons) and then tomorrow I have to go pick up the buns (we're having BBQs/Sloppy Joes; whatever you want to call them. Meat already purchased). I'd like to decorate the park shelter a bit beforehand; party starts at 4:00 but I guess there are people there at the shelter before us until 2:00. Nobody freaking RSVPs so we'll just plan on having enough for more than we think.

I have had appointments for the kids and myself lately, left and right, and so I feel like I'm always running.

My self-esteem has been down in the dumps lately for whatever reason -- I tend to just get in these moods where the stress overwhelms and I just feel moody. I haven't exercised in a month or more.

So time to focus on things. We'll get through the party, I'll get some great pictures, and life will move on. In a few weeks, Andrew starts back up with school (pre-k again for those who missed the memo), then it will be several relaxing months before the holiday season.

Breathe in, breathe out . . .

Don't get me wrong. I love my life. But I also get stressed sometimes feeling stretched too thin.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Random acts of kindness

The husband spent several hours yesterday looking at wide angle lenses for my camera (I have a full frame, the Canon 5D Mark II, and right now, the only lenses I have are the "nifty fifty" 50 mm f/1.8 -- does the trick, a Tamron 28-75 f/2.8 which I've been using a lot lately, and an old Tamron 75-300 that I never use). I don't know whether I really need a wide angle, as I primarily shoot portrait, but it would be great for landscapes and large groups of people. I envision taking my kids up on the bluff and getting a really awesome wide angle shot. Not that they'd sit for it, but maybe I could get pics of them all running in different directions with the contrast of a menacing sky or a sunset.

Anyway, I thought it was sweet that the hubby was reading reviews of different lenses (he loves to research before he buys). He informed me last night that he learned a lot about the difference between full frame cameras and crop sensors and how certain lenses would not work for my camera, etc. He has always supported my hobby turned 2nd job: photography, but I think he will be more open minded the more he actually knows about it. He may grumble a little when a shoot takes longer than my allotted hour time slot, but he's also with three kids all day long, cooking for then, cleaning up after them, and listening to the shrill scream of our middle child. I totally get why it'd be hard to spend most of a day without venturing out.

He does enjoy looking at my pictures as I'm editing them and will tell me which ones he likes best and why. He will say, "wow!" often and he is educated enough on photography to know when stuff is amateur or if it's really good. I like to bounce ideas off him during the editing process and see which one speaks to him, as sometimes it's different than my favorite one.

As for the lens, I'm in no rush right now. A really nice one would also be really expensive, and I don't know enough yet about the off brands (Tamron really doesn't have a wide angle, Sigma; Tokina) to make a purchase.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

On this day . . .

On this day, one year ago, my Jameson was born in the water (you can read that birth story here). It was my 2nd waterbirth, but third time going through labor. I still remember most of the highlights of the day and I hope to continue to remember it, but for now, I will just share some pictures. (Don't mind the fact that these were taken with a point-and-shoot and/or my cell phone.)

Grandma (my mom)
 Happy birthday, Jameson Goat! We love you so much.


Tuesday, August 14, 2012

It is so annoying . . .

being around miserable people. My goodness. STFU and count your blessings!

Friday, August 10, 2012


I am not perfect, and I won't strive to be either.

But what I am is . . .

I am a hard worker.
I am a good mother.
I am a good wife.
I am a good friend.
I am a good listener.
I have a beautiful soul.
I have good morals.
I am worthy of others' respect and friendship.
I am proud of my struggles I have overcome.
I am strong, and strong-willed.

I will try harder to be myself, always, and be happy with myself.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Little Lady... a post about Elise

Elise is growing up so much! She's been speaking in full sentences for quite some time now and her speech is pretty clear. Last night I had the opportunity to go shopping with her, just the two of us (Andrew had a sleepover at Grandma's house, my mom's that is). We first went to Target to return something (a dress I bought which I liked in the dressing room but got home and tried on and it wasn't form fitting enough in the top part so it almost looked like I was wearing a sports bra or had no boobs -- and I just didn't like it). Elise got complimented when she was in the shopping cart: "She's so beautiful!" the cashier said. "Why thank you!", I replied. Of course, I know she's beautiful but I am a little biased as her mama.

Then we went to the car and I asked if she wanted to go to TJ (Maxx) and she said, "yeah!" so off we went. Elise talks in a VERY LOUD VOICE and as I was looking at the clothing on the racks, she declared, "I want boobie!" I was able to distract her enough but it was cute because she was just saying random silly stuff and laughing. I love that I can joke with her and be silly and she's almost 2.5 now so she knows "oh, Mom's being silly" or "oh, it's serious time", etc. I ended up finding a basic black knee-length skirt (I've been looking forever but couldn't find the right style for what I wanted -- either they were too short and not work approps or they came up too high and were just old lady ugly). $16.99 and it fit like a dream (I danced in the dressing room because it was as HUGE one that I could fit the shopping cart in. I had to make sure the skirt would be able to handle me and my wild moves, after all.) We laughed and then checked out.

Finally we went grocery shopping and just grabbed a few items and made our way home.

She went to bed REALLY good last night and only gave out one little cry before deciding it was in her best interest to go to sleep. She slept all night again, as she has the past several nights. I am happy that she is continuing to nurse and that I met her night needs for as long as she wanted. I could not deny her when I knew that it was a comfort for her; I also knew eventually she wouldn't feel the need to nurse at night anymore. There always comes a time when a child discovers that sleep feels good and maybe she wakes up and thinks about boobie and falls back asleep; maybe she sleeps all night long. But I am only a door away in case she should need me, if she would ever be sick.

I love my little doll!

My beautiful girl in the park Saturday night

Elise is a Daddy's girl too

 © 2012  All images are property of the author and may NOT be used, copied, or edited under any circumstances.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Sensory Evaluation.

Andrew had his appointment on Tuesday with the Pediatric Behavioral Specialist he has seen in the past. She sees enough behaviors that would fall into either ADHD (most likely) and something on the spectrum (probably mild Asperger's). She stated that he does a lot of movement that is without purpose (I believe this is fidgeting she is referring to). His need for his cars to always be in his hand -- always lining them up and not really driving them around. You all remember his intricate patterns he used to make with them (I had posted pics on Facebook in the past). Everything revolves around his cars and he will cry if we take them away (for instance, if he pushes his sister or brother away from him). He has frequent angry outburts he is unable to control and a lack of impulse control (his teacher noted this as well). For instance, we have told him not to do certain things (like turning over all the pavers in the yard looking for bugs/grubs) and it doesn't seem to get through at all -- he only has one goal in mind and that is to get the bugs. He brings bugs in all the time and has an obsession with them (some of this is normal little boy stuff; some of it could be sensory).

She said one thing she noticed that would maybe rule out a spectrum disorder would be that he is social, but she noticed that there seemed to be a routine to the questions. Andrew goes up to nearly everyone in public and will say, "what's your name? Where does your work live? What kind of car do you have? What color is it? What time do you get home from work" or if they mention a spouse, he will say, "what color hair does he have?" These are odd questions for someone his age (I think) and very typical of Aspies.

His tantrums are uncontrollable and definitely not very normal for his age.

He was late to walk and has trouble with fine motor skills (writing with a pencil -- he can trace some letters now but not write words like some of his classmates could -- his teacher didn't think this was a concern just yet), freaks out when a shirt is inside out and cannot figure out how to fix it. I remember when he was 16 months old, he seemed to have a hard time getting up if he was on his back -- like getting to a sitting position.

He's very intelligent, very expansive vocabulary, but is definitely socially awkward. This may be endearing at the age he is now, but I would imagine in a few years, it wouldn't be so endearing.

When we go to a store, any store, he immediately bolts and goes full speed ahead, ignores me when I tell him to stop, and doesn't care if he about knocks people over. His only goal is to get to the cars and line them up.

I asked him if there is a reason he runs at the grocery store. I ask him if there is something that bothers him when we walk in. I asked him what he hears. He said, "I hear people talking." It seems to be a strange response because I really don't notice that when I go in. Maybe he hears all the conversations and it drives him nuts.

He will ramble on and on to people about stuff and isn't aware of the awkwardness or if they are bored, etc. He feels compelled to tell strangers that he went to a birthday party back in June. I am not sure if he is imitating adult conversation or if this is normal.

He prefers adults to kids. He sneaks to the neighbors to talk to them whenever they are outside. One day he went over there probably 10 times.

He seems to have a poor understanding of safety (looking for cars, etc.) and biked straight across the road the other day without looking for cars.

He enjoys wearing long sleeves and sobs sometimes like at the change of season, in spring, when I make him wear short sleeves. He sees no issue with wearing his red train sweater outside when it's 95 degrees.

When I went to his classroom, it happened to be Dr. Seuss' birthday so all the kids went in the hall and simultaneously read books. Andrew could not focus and held his hands over his ears and said, "Mom, it's TOO LOUD!" [it was more like a dull roar] He will turn off fans if they are going because he doesn't like the noise and today when I was blow drying my hair, he covered his ears and told me it was too loud.

He did not play with toys until age 3.5 when he got his first cars. That is all he will play with. He lines them up on the couch all day long. He brings them to the dinner table and the bathroom and in the car and EVERYWHERE. His first "toy" he took to was at about 20 months and that was my hairdryer. He wanted to carry it everywhere.

All of these things have always stood out to me and now we are finally going to get a sensory assessment done to see if, indeed, he is on the spectrum. If not, he probably does at least have ADHD. I don't want to go straight to meds, but there is some occupational therapy we can try. If he absolutely cannot function in school or his behavior worsens, we have opened up to trying meds.

I just want to get him the help he needs. My other two are developing differently than he did (playing with toys) and I can see now that Andrew has been different from the start. Amazing, beautiful, boy, but definitely marches to the beat of his own drum.